27 Things Overheard at US Universities

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We’ve trawled through the best “Overheard at University” pages, taking note of all the bizarre, inappropriate, thick and downright disgraceful things that have been overheard at Universities throughout the United States.

Students, we love you – but sometimes we wonder how you manage to get out of bed in the morning…

1. Overheard at the University of California, Davis:

Student: “Today I realized the senior thesis I turned in last week uses the word ‘asses’ instead of ‘assess’ 17 times.”

Via Giphy.

2. Overheard at Missouri State University:

Student: “I got these garlic bread chips and I swear they taste like garlic bread.”

Via Giphy.

3. Overheard at the University of Chicago:

Student: “I was emotionally scarred by Finding Nemo.”

Via Giphy.

4. Overheard at the American University:

Student: “Do you think sharks are capable of love?”

Via Giphy.

5. Overheard at Stanford University:

Student: “Whenever you’re feeling down, just remember you are a star in a million tourist’s home videos.”

Via Giphy.

6. Overheard at Baylor University:

Student: “I just really miss popping his back zits. God I loved him.”

Via Giphy.

7. Overheard at the Missouri University of Science and Technology:

Student; “You come into my house and expect me not to touch your knees?”

Via Giphy.

8. Overheard at Arizona State University:

Student 1: “I’m having a really hard time concentrating…It must have been those two beers I drank.”

Student 2: “You had two beers before class?”

Student 1: “Yeah…”

Via Giphy.

9. Overheard at the George Washington University:

Student: “Baby dressed in skimpy clothes and ran away with a juggalo when she could have studied economics at Yale, so anyone who thinks Dirty Dancing has a happy ending is a stupid muggle.”

Via Giphy.

10. Overheard at the University of Albany:

“Student: I’m on a reward system. After I write each page of my paper, I get a beer. It’s a six page paper so it all works out.”

Via Giphy.

11. Overheard at Dartmouth College:

Girl: “Do you want to watch How to Train Your Dragon?”

Boy: “No…I already know how to train my dragon.”

Via Giphy.

12. Overheard at Purdue University:

Student: “If I puke in the washing machine, will it wash?”

Via Giphy.

13. Overheard at Oklahoma State University:

Student: “Ever been so broke you have sleep for dinner?”

Via Giphy.

14. Overheard at the University of Minnesota:

Student 1: “My cousin from Germany was here and I had no idea what he was saying.”

Student 2: “Is he hot?”

Student 1: “…He’s 8…”

Via Giphy.

15. Overheard at the University of Denver:

Student 1: “Oh my God dude, who does that?! Who pees in the elevator?”

Student 2: “Apparently I do!”

Via Giphy.

16. Overheard at Drake University:

Student: “You can’t pee and walk at the same time! We have tried this!”

Via Giphy.

17. Overheard at the University of Texas:

Student: “We just need to get really drunk and run down the stairs and see what happens.”

Via Giphy.

18. Overheard at the University of Delaware:

Student: “She has diabetes…that’s like, the best diet ever.”

Via Giphy.

19. Overheard at Susquehanna University:

Professor: “Was anyone in the public library at Selinsgrove last night?”

Class: **All shake their heads – no**

Professor: “Okay, I was just wondering because an SU student was trying to pick up my wife but she turned him down.”

Via Giphy.

20. Overheard at Bob Jones University:

Student 1: “Didn’t Mozart play the clavicle?”

Student: “Don’t you mean the clavichord?”

Student: “Yeah, that.”

Via Giphy.

21. Overheard at Emory University:

Student: “I don’t breathe through my mouth because sometimes I swallow the air and it makes me burp.”

Via Giphy.

22. Overheard at Vanderbilt University:

Student 1: “Smells like Friday night.”

Student 2: “It smells like laundry detergent.”

Student 1: “Yeah…that’s my ususal Friday night.”

Via Giphy.

23. Overheard at the University of Maine:

Student: “This book is like my brain but, like…in paper form.”

Via Giphy.

24. Overheard at Idaho State University:

Student: “I’m vegan, so I buy all my leather second hand.”

Via Giphy.

25. Overheard at High Point University:

Student 1: “It’s in, like, Hungaria or something.”

Student 2: “You mean Hungary?”

Student 1: “…Yeah.”

Via Giphy.

26. Overheard at Indiana University Bloomington:

Student: “Dude, I just got cock-blocked by a fire alarm.”

Via Giphy.

27. Overheard at Temple University:

Student: “This one time, I made out with a girl who had an asthma attack…I thought I was God.”

Via Giphy.

Image via Shutterstock.

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