Let’s cut straight to the chase. I believe that resilience is single-handedly the most important thing for our generation to have.
Before you start calling me washed and old – Gen Z-ers, I’m one of you. And I can tell you that having resilience isn’t about being the smartest person in the team, or plastering your success on LinkedIn for everyone to see. And it sure isn’t about being lucky.
It’s about going through challenges and hardship and still having the will to keep moving forward.
Let’s be clear – resilience is not the absence of pain. You will most certainly go through pain, failure, and disappointment. These moments inevitably happen and can drastically alter the course of our lives. That’s just reality.
So you may ask; how exactly do you build resilience? Is there a useful listicle somewhere with tips and tricks on developing this much-needed skill?
Probably. But this isn’t going to be one.
I have a marketing diploma and a double major in advertising and public relations, but writing has always been my passion. Source: Emma Elizabeth
My honest answer is that there is no universal formula for building resilience. You have to develop the necessary grit to move onwards, being brave enough to protect yourself from both naysayers and your own destructive thoughts.
In rudimentary terms, it’s all about telling yourself, “I’m already in pain, but I might as well keep going.”
Take it from me, a Gen Z-er who just entered her late 20s.
I remember distinct moments in my life when I was forced to resort to resilience.
If I hadn’t struggled in a Chinese school, I wouldn’t be proficient in Mandarin today. I probably would have wound up in some private academy, costing my parents a fortune. In true Asian tradition, I was constantly punished for poor grades and being unable to converse in the language – but being able to speak multiple languages today has benefited me in many ways, especially in a multicultural country like Malaysia.
If I had never insisted on moving out, I’d still be living off my parents. I’d probably rack up their electricity bill, fill our porch with parcels from online shopping, and still rely on mum to do my laundry for me. Sure, I was broke for the first year – maybe the second one, too – that I moved out, but it taught me a hard lesson about financial planning and independence.
Most of all, if I had never forced myself out of my depression, I wouldn’t be alive today to experience all that life has to offer. It may sound cheesy, but this is what being resilient has granted me – a loving family, a wonderful partner, kind friends, and a cosy home to call my own.
It’s a blessing.
So just because they started as painful moments doesn’t mean they have to remain that way. You can either wallow in self-pity or choose to stand up again; you can be tired and discouraged, or you can be tired and happy.
Hear me out, my fellow Gen Z-ers. There’s nothing wrong with plans falling apart, friends moving on, or digging into your savings for emergencies. New plans can be made, new friends will come along, and your money will eventually return.
Ultimately, as long as you practise resilience, you’ll be okay, even if you have to start over again. All it takes is just getting back up.
No worries if you’ve struggled over the past year; that’s why we look towards the future.
One of my favourite coping mechanisms was dyeing my hair. Source: Emma Elizabeth
We’re one month into 2025, and if it’s been uneventful for you thus far, just know that the remaining year will have much in store for you.
As much as that phrase holds promise, it can also be overwhelming. You – or at least, the people around you – are making resolutions: save more money, exercise more, try out a new diet, travel to new places, etc, the list goes on.
And while you’re already overwhelmed with trying to get your life together, someone older will always go, “Gen Z doesn’t want to work hard,” or “Gen Z can’t handle stress.” Believe me, I’m from an Asian family – I’ve had my fair share of irritation listening to others go on about “your generation” in a condescending tone.
Your first instinct – and mine too, initially – would be to protest against these statements. After all, it’s a difficult transition period – career decisions, finances, planning for the future, all while navigating inflation, career instability, spotty healthcare access, an ageing population, and more.
But if 2024 has taught me one thing, it’s why resilience is important to thrive in these times. And as much as I love my generation, some of us are sorely lacking it.
We often start out the year with big plans – promotions, travelling, health goals, and so on.
But when the year goes on, and we fail to meet those expectations, we start to crumble. Plans fall apart, friends become strangers, money saved for travel goes to emergencies, and perhaps the weighing scale isn’t tipping how you wanted it to.
For Gen Z, the new star of the global workforce, it’s all too common.
Don’t get me wrong – I’m still pretty proud of my generation. We’re the ones who entered the job market when the world was in chaos from a pandemic. Not all of us started with traditional pathways to career growth, and we grappled with uncertainty while trying to hustle, adapt, and find new opportunities.
But perhaps that’s how it all starts. Ninety percent of Gen Z young adults reported feeling psychological and physiological stress in 2024, according to a study by The American Psychological Association.
In Asia alone, over six in 10 individuals are at high risk of mental health disorders.
And with staggering statistics like these, there’s an underlying issue that no amount of mental health campaigns or TikTok videos will address – a lack of emotional resilience.
In other words, hardly anyone ever tells people that they should learn to suck it up.
If you’re chronically online like me, you’d have seen a massive shift in the way people perceive mental health. We’re now actively talking about practising self-care, setting boundaries, and even encouraging people to explore proper diagnosis and treatments.
This is fantastic progress in identifying our emotional states. If anything, I’m grateful for the shift; I’ve known way too many people who are purposely obtuse when it comes to their mental state.
But when the scales tip just a little bit too far, it lapses into lacking emotional resilience.
We start underestimating how well we can cope with ourselves and the people around us. There will be times when we struggle with handling criticism, relationship conflict, or overall just being able to manage difficult emotions.
Social media, unfortunately, plays a part. You used to have to travel to meet friends, especially if you lived far away from each other. Malls, movies, arcades – those were in-person activities that you’d do in physical locations.
Now? Not so much. We’re in what The Atlantic staff writer and author Derek Thompson calls “the anti-social century.”
Now, it’s easy to shoot a message at each other via social media platforms or sit in a voice call and watch shows on virtual platforms such as Discord. Entertainment is even easier with many streaming options and short-form content platforms like Instagram Reels or TikTok — no longer do we have to go to cinemas for the latest movies or go to pubs to watch live matches.
People sit in their dim rooms, spending their hours and days away seeking dopamine through their screens. It takes a toll on their psyche as they grow increasingly dependent on technology and susceptible to negativity online, sometimes even forgetting that what they see may be a fabrication of someone’s life.
It’s reflected in situations such as being too sad to go out, skipping out on responsibilities because you don’t feel up for it, cancelling plans with friends, or avoiding important conversations out of anxiety or even fear of confrontation.
It can also extend to self-destructive behaviours such as doomscrolling or excessive online shopping. When does the “treat yourself” go too far?
While these situations aren’t incoherently wrong, too much of it shows that you lack emotional resilience. Cancelling plans, excusing avoidant behaviour, or being deliberately blind to your mental state can be a slippery slope when actively encouraged.
As we enter an even more fractured world with so many uncertain futures, it’s up to us to salvage what’s left behind and put the pieces back together, and without proper resilience, we’re never going to get there.
This was me at my 21st birthday party — something I previously imagined wouldn’t happen. Source: Emma Elizabeth
True, it may be harsh for me to say that my generation lacks resilience. But I say it from a self-critical perspective.
Indeed, I see myself in those lines above; blowing off friends, wallowing in self-misery, attempting to scramble for any form of dopamine through digital content or indulgent purchases, and more.
Truthfully, there were even times I told myself I wouldn’t want to live past my teens, as the idea of life depressed me despite attempting to find happiness.
But ultimately, I realised that I wasn’t going to succeed with avoidance. Ignoring my pain and attempting to seek out joy wasn’t working because I only thought about going around my obstacles instead of going through them.
That’s what real resilience is all about. And it’s time for you to suck it up too.
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